We are what We wear...

Hello my dears,

Today I want to talk with you about something that’s been on my mind for a long time already. I’ve actually had stickies on my closet with reminders and notes for this subject. 

As you might have notices already, Fashion is a really big deal for me. No matter which route I take I always go back to fashion one way or another. Just like fashion my dreams of fashion are constantly changing, as do my wishes and goals for the future. But some time ago I started wondering: what does fashion actually mean to me?

Hello Kitty at the Sieboldhuis Leiden

Hello my dears,

Last Sunday, 9 oktober 2011, I went to the Hello Kitty exhibition at the Sieboldhuis in Leiden. Yay.

Something which was really strange for me was going to a museum alone. I've always been with somebody, a friend, my mom, just somebody, but never alone. But this weekend, I went alone. It took me a 8 hour train trip (to and back) and I walked toward the museum itself (which happened to be farther away then I though it would be, oeps?) but I got to see Hello Kitty! Though it was visible that the exhibition was for little kids, it was fun to see all the stuff gathered together. Being a semi big fan of Hello Kitty and a Huge fan of Japan I had a super day.

I took some pictures with my phone. They're not the best but they'll have to do.
Enjoy

Searching for: something to write about...

Hello my dears,

Before this and the last 2 posts I had a really long period I didn't write that much, as you might have noticed. I simply didn't know what to write about. And actually I still don't.
I'd like to write about my dreams but I'm not quite sure what they are. I'd like to write about something interesting but for some weird reason that always turns out to be a horrible post, haha. I'd want to write about something but I seriously don't know what that something has to be.

Writers block much?

10 day challenge day 2

My second entry of my 10 day challenge.

As you can see this one is completely different. I have no real experience with how it works in a magazine world, so this is pretty much just how I image how one of my days might look like, without the stress of the job and other things. I know it would be a lot harder though but, it's my fantasy after all ;)

I wake up to my alarm and get out of bed to start my day. I shower, eat breakfast, dress myself in my normal attire for work (which for today contains a dressed pants, blouse with ribbon around the collar, a matching blazer and low heel dress shoes).

When I’m all done dressing and packing my bag I go to work. I work as an editor at a fashion magazine. I love my job. I work with people who are fun to work with, but aren’t afraid they think what you’re doing isn’t good (enough) and instead of letting you hanging after they told you they think it sucks they help you improve it. We aim to challenge each other to get better at what we’re doing. Today we have a meeting with lunch to discuss each other’s work in the latest issue of the magazine. Everybody who works in our team is attending.

After lunch I have a meeting with our own team to discuss what kind of subjects we will be writing on for the upcoming volume. Though the start of the meeting is slow, in the end we gather a lot of idea’s to work on. I love how dedicated everybody is to this job.

After the day finished I go to get dinner with a group of friends. It is a monthly thing we do to keep in contact with each other. We don’t skip it unless we’re home with a serious illness, someone died or something else that is too important to let it pass. Once again dinner is fun. We discuss our work, our projects, our boyfriends and girlfriends and just everything we feel like talking about.

At the end of the night I have a nice little buzz in my head (might have something to do with the 2 glasses of wine I had) and I got to bed with a content feeling.

10 Day Challenge: Day 1

First entry of my 10 day challenge.
(note: this is fiction. This is not what my day really looks like)

Day 1

My alarm is going off. It’s 7 am and time to wake up. I curl myself up in my blanket only to stretch myself out fully after that. I climb out of bed and check my agenda. Today will be a busy day but at least I will be able to go home on time and make dinner.

I hop into the shower and get dressed in a black skirt, white ruffle blouse and a fashionable black blazer. Once I’m happy with the way I am dressed I make myself some breakfast ( 2 toasts with jam) and a cup of old fashion coffee. Once I finished my toast I do my hair (a simple but fashionable bun) and make-up (foundation and mascara and maybe a bit of rouge). While finishing my second cup of coffee I pack my bag and get ready to go.

I have to be at the office at 9.00 A.M. Luckily I live close by so this only takes me about 30 minutes (walking, public transport, walking some more, or a cab) Once I arrived at the office I check my mail and edit my agenda. My day is filled with writing, calling, arranging and 2 appointments with some of our clients. During lunch break me and some colleges go to a lunchroom close by to discuss the progress of some projects and other things.

By 6.00 I will be done with work and go home. I already did groceries the day before, when I got of early. I’m making something easy, with a side salad. After dinner I put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher and change into a more comfortable outfit and take of my make-up. I cuddle myself in the chair before the television and watch my favorite programs. When they ended I shut of the television, check my mail and edit my agenda for the last time today. I put up a cd and get a magazine and a notepad. I want to be able to write down my ideas right away. Once I get bored with my magazine I get my book and get in bed. Before going to sleep I read a chapter or 2, check if my alarm is set on the right time and turn of the light. Time to sleep.

Chibi ohimesama

10 Day Challenge: Progress

Hello my dears,

It has been some time since I last posted, I know. Lets just say a lot of things have been going on in my live, like work, love, hate, confusion and just plain chaos. There are a lot of things I'm looking forward to (positive things) and an equal lot of things I do not look forward to (negative things). For one, I'm going to meet a person again, whom I'm afraid of, in the very near future. Not something to look forward to.

But! School is also starting soon. And as weird as it might sound to some of you, I'm really looking forward to it! I can't wait to get started again and learn new things, get to know new people! And to show myself (and others) I can actually do it!

After some fighting with myself I finally started the 10 day challenge. It has turned out to be a lot harder then I thought. To think up all the details I want my "perfect day" to have. Not to mention, my "perfect day" sometimes changes from day to day. But at least I started. I'm working on my "perfect days" and I already learned a thing or to about myself.

I have changed my mind about posting them though. I AM still going to post them, just not on my blog. The 10 day challenge posts will be posted on my Live journal (yes, very oldschool, but you got to love it) and I will posts the links to them in a combined post about the end result! How does that sound?

An other thing I changed: There are going to be 10 days, but not 10 days right after each other. Sometimes I'm so confused about things that I can hardly write about them. So I'm just working on things until I finished an other "perfect day". I'm just doing it the way I think will help me best , so... None will blame me for it, right?

I'm just going to do it the way I think is the best. I think thats the best way to go, don't you?

There are a lot of things I want to write, and want to do right now. But I think the best thing for me to do, is to try to study a little, and after that to maybe write about my perfect day again.

Love you,

Chibi Ohimesama

My new room

Hello my Dears,

It took me a while, but I finally took the time (had the time) to make some pictures of my new room.

Please enjoy~

Love you,

Until next time

Things that annoy me...

(disclaimer: I do not mean to insult anybody with what I write here today.)

Hello my Dears,

Did you know? When your on holiday somewhere, there are ways to recognize Dutch people.
I have noticed this many many times before, both in my own country as well as in the countries I have been to spend my holiday in. When there is a person who is crossing the road next to a zebra crossing -say, 10 meters besides it- you can be almost certain that person is a Dutch person!

(translation: typically Dutch)

Now of course there are Dutch people who do use a zebra crossing to cross a road, and there are none-Dutch people who do not use a zebra crossing to cross a road. But when I was visiting Antwerp someone actually told me its a very common thing for Dutch people to do!

When I heard this I started looking for fellow Dutch people who do this, and guess what? Jep, indeed! A lot of Dutch people actually do this! My own family and friends do it as well! I was amazed by it when I noticed it was actually a true thing which the man told me. That was about 7 years ago. Now, I can't help but be annoyed by these "typical Dutch things".

An other typically Dutch thing: Asking for a discount (note: of course this happens in other countries too, but we are known for it). We have a special sayings for it, amongst them: "Af dingen" and "Pingelen". Now of course, when you can get a discount, why not ask for it? Or if something on the market is really expensive, getting something off the price can be really helpful, and asking never hurt a man, right? But what if it gets annoying? What if people don't stop asking for a discount, until its almost for free? Or when they start getting forceful, angry and rude? Asking for a discount in places where you really can't get one! And getting mad when they don't get it! Thus, a lot of people get mad. And to some people, yes I sometimes make myself guilty of this as well, I'm no saint, but so do you!

Dutch people are known as "People who like to have things for as little money as possible". There are even the sayings like "Going Dutch" or "Having a Dutch party" (which we actually call an "American party"). And of course, who wouldn't want things cheap? When I find a cheap cute dress, I feel really lucky! But I really dislike it when I'm walking in a store and I hear people complain about the price. Sometimes I hear people complain about something that is already really cheap, but they still think it's to expensive! As if they're not happy until it's for free! But they don't understand that when something is cheap, someone is not getting his or her money! And then when people get fired to because the company has to cut down on they're expenses, they complain even more!!

I think Dutch people complain to much. Everything is always someone els his/her fault, but never our own. "I" has to get everything "I" wants to have, "I" lives only to serve "I" but "he/she" must keep in mind that the world is all about "I" and should do everything to please "I". If "he/she" does not do what "I" wants, "I" gets mad.

Traffic is a perfect example of this. Holland is quite small, but we have a lot of roads and cars. It's uncommon to have a rush hour without a traffic jam. When on the road, we are driving with a lot of other cars on the same road as us. Sometimes someone does something stupid or rude. Some people's first reaction is to shout and give them the finger. They become angry and try to "get back" at the driver. Thus they start annoying other drivers, which usually makes things worse. But they themselves have done nothing wrong! They themselves can drive perfectly! All the other drivers should have they're drivers licence taken away, but not them, ooh no, because they are perfect.

A few years back we went to Paris by car. We are used to the Dutch style of driving so when we entered France, suddenly things started to get far more relaxed! I can't really explain it, I guess it is something you have to see for yourself. The traffic in France has it's own pace, or something. After a week in Paris we went back again. We were driving on the road, the easy "lalallalala" way, when suddenly some kind of idiot drives past up pulling stunts and driving a few Km/h to fast. Guess what kind of licence plate the idiot had? Jep, it was a Dutch one. The closer we got to Holland, the more idiots we encountered, until we were surrounded by idiots, and got used to the Dutch way of driving again. I have had some Germans who also said that Dutch people are idiots on the road.

You know, I used to be really proud of being a Dutch girl. The Netherlands were my pride! But so many things are changing. People are getting rude and only care about themselves. We are starting to lose our morals and values. Of course this is something that happens everywhere, but these are the things that bother me most. And of course I do know that not every Dutch person is like this but, these are the "typical Dutch things" that bother me.

I hope I will give the people who read this something to think about. And please share your thoughts.
And for those who feel insulted by this: I'm really sorry if I insulted you, I did not mean to do so, but hate comments will be deleted and I will not delete this post.


Love,

Chibi Ohimesama

(ps: Pictures of my room will follow, but I wanted to get this off my chest first, because it had been annoying me for ages)
(source picture: http://www.goeievraag.nl/vraag/typisch-nederlands.33894)

Moving is a hassle...2

hello my dears,

Theres not a lot to share today, sadly.

But I did want to share something fun: my first experience with painting! I'm finally growing up.

This is what my hands look like right now, haha. Yes, I am typing with those painty hands <3

Love ya <3

Moving is a hassle...

Hello my dears,

I'm afraid you'll have to do a bit longer without updates, because I'm moving to a better room <3
I'm going from 11m2 to 21m2 -huge improvement-, from 14 people I don't like/semi like/hardly know to 3 people I really like (and one I have yet to meet). I'm so happy T-T.

When I moved, I might just post pictures of my new room cause I'm going to paint a wall~ .. for the first time in my life, haha.

Well, until after my moving~

Love you

(Re)learning concentration

Hello my Dears,

I have finally found the will to post something again. I still have a hard time realizing I actually passed. I don't think I will actually realize it until I have my first day of school as a Ninensei (second year student).

Even if I'm still in a bit of a cloud, finally having some peace and time for myself, I try to keep going with my studies. I need to keep repeating my Japanese (all of it) in order to not forget it during this summer holiday (I know I will) and to improve it (I really need to). But, I noticed I have a really hard time concentrating on one thing at a time!

Lately there are a lot of articles on how the internet screws and changes our brain. Articles like this one is an example of those articles. The point is: internet is shortening our attention span. The first time I read about this (about 2 years ago) I didn't believe it. I mean, why should I? I read the whole twilight serie, and the last harry potter book, in one week. But this year I started noticing, I could not concentrate on my homework, or my studies, for much longer then 30 minuts (and even that was stretching it). I get bored by long blog posts, when I'm reading fanfiction I switch from fanfiction to facebook to twitter to tumblr and back to my fanfiction. I've gotten so used to quick information, short messages and changing screens, that I have a hard time keeping to one thing at a time!

Within a year time I've shortened my attention span AND become a social media addict!

I'm sort of at a loss on what to do about this! And internet stop would be an idea, but everything I have is on the internet! e-mail (both personal and for school), msn (with my family), facebook (for friends AND school), school information, bank account, moving to a new room, we need the internet!!! Sure I still have my cellphone, but none of my friends call anymore! They use smartphones, so we use facebook and msn for that! I could send out letters, but as cute and fashionable old fashion it is, I will most likely get my very late response through mail, facebook or msn.

Being online less is an option, an option I'm trying, but what to do in the meantime?

So I have gone back to reading books. I've started reading books again before going to sleep, and I'm trying to read about an hour per day for now. Which I noticed already isn't quite as easy as it was a year or so ago. I keep wanting to check facebook and twitter and my e-mail.

But what else to do? So besides reading books I have started to do write in my dairy. I just start writing and continue writing until I have nothing to write about anymore, or until I feel content. I use it to release the thoughts in my head, and to concentrate on something! It is actually quite funny to do. I realize a lot of things while being busy with free writing. One of those things? My head is a complete and utter mess! One more reason to (re)learn to focus on one thing at a time.

The last thing on my list of "ways to (re)learn concentration" is a list of things I need to do for Japanese homework each day. 1 whole A4 page of kanji per day, and when I can do that without to much distractions, 1 hole A4 page of words per day, and so on. This way I keep busy with my studies and maybe expand my attention span again.

I want to (re)learn to concentrate for a longer time period, like I could do before I became a social media addict. If you have the same problem, if you have any tips, or just a comment, please leave a message!

Love you,

Chibi Ohimesama

(picture source: Tumblr.com)

Dazed, But I made it.

Just a really quick update:

I'm still really dazed, I can hardly believe it, but....
I passed... I've become a second year student of our Japan study... It's still really hard to grasp.

I think that somewhere I started to prepare myself for not making it, so making it still kinda came as a (pleasant and welcome) shock.

Ones I get out of my daze (and everything is arranged for the new year) I will start updating again.

Thank you all for the support,
Love you guys

Need for study....

Hello my Dears,

I want to start with a happy note: I PASSED MY JAPANESE SPEAKING RETAKE (and I seriously have no idea how). I'm super happy :D because this means I still have a chance. I'm on my way to my 4th blok period tests now. So I got 4 more Japanese tests to go. Which means that I have to study like hell!!

There are a lot of things I need to do: I need to study English, I need to study Japanese cultural knowledge and I need to study every aspect of the Japanese language we have had up until now. So that means I have to study Japanese grammar, Japanese Kanji, Japanese listening, and Japanese speaking. Thats a lot of studying, believe me on that.
I only have a few more days for everything, and I'm kinda freaking out. Okay, I'm really freaking out. I'm really glad I have my Japanese speaking test 2 weeks from now, instead of coming week. So I have more time for that. But I really just want to pass it all.

I really want to become a second year student. I want to have cute little kohai (students of a lower grade then me), and just really get to my goal! I want to stay and have fun with everybody, and feel like I'm finally doing what I like! Which is this study!!

But sadly, I get distracted really fast -I am, after all, typing this blog entry instead of studying, aren't I?- so I have to get rid of my distractions. How am I going to do this??? I'm going to cancel my number one distraction: The Internet.

After I finished this post, I'm going to exit my browser. So that means:
- No more facebook
- No more tumblr
- No more twitter
- No more blogging (after this one)
- Lots and lots of studying
- Small little fun breaks in between, but only when I finished a subject. And no longer then 10 to 20 minutes
- 2 or 3 big breaks of 30 to 60 minutes MAX

And I am going to try my absolute best!! I WILL become a second year student of the Japanese language!!

Please with me luck, cheer me on, and I will come back to you after my tests are over to update you on the end results!

Love you guys!!

Until next time

10/20/30 Day Challenge Idea.

Hello my Dears~

Have you missed me? I've been busy with my studies these past few days (and I still need to keep going) but I took this little moment to write out an idea I have. I got this idea while reading a Magazine article.

As some of you might know, I'm currently looking for myself. I'm not really sure what I want to become, or who I am. I know I want to keep studying Japanese, and I want to do something with my love for fashion. Lately I have also become very interested in writing, blogging and magazines. But I'm really not sure what to do with all of it!!

The other day, when I was riding the train back home, I was reading a magazine we probably all know: Glamour. There was this one article about "Coming out of the closet". Normally this phrase is used for homosexuals who hide they're sexuality or who do not know for sure. But Glamour used it for hiding what you wanted to be/do, or not knowing what you wanted to be/do, Jobwise. It was a really interesting article. (If you live in Holland or Belgium and you want to read it: Buy the Juli 2011 Glamour edition.)

Now for the part that inspired me for the 10/20/30 Day Challenge: Glamour always used these little side boxes with extra information. With this article they also had a side box with extra information about how to find out what your ideal choice for work was. And it is actually really simple! I'll try to translate the extra information for a bit (I do hope thats legal, haha)

What does your ideal day look like?
How do you figure out what your ideal work choice is? Try walking your ideal work(day) through. Live that day as if it where the present, in detail, from the moment you wake up, until the moment you go to bed. Write it down if you think thats easier. The following questions might give you a hand: What is the first thing you do when you wake up? What do you eat for breakfast? Do you prepare it yourself, or does someone bring it to you, along with a rose and a newspaper. What cloths will you wear? Try to think about every part of the day: Are you inside or outside, calm or active, alone or with other people. Try to keep 3 things in mind when you run through your ideal day: WHAT kind of things do you do? It doesn't matter if you do not have the skills yet, you are daydreaming, after all. WHERE are you, in which situation, on which location? And with WHOM do you work, laugh or talk? It does not have to be people you personally know, famous people or imaginary ideal employee are okay as well. This way it will become clear, for example, if you are a teamperson or an Einzelgänger, if you are somebody who wants to take there time working on a big/long project or if you are somebody who needs variation and change.
(source: Glamour Dutch edition Juli 2011)

And thats my idea for the 10/20/30 Day Challenge: To write out my ideal (work) day for 10/20/30 days!!! And I call it: What does your idea day look like 10/20/30 day challenge! This will help me get an idea of what I want to do, whom I want to be, where I want to be. I will try to do this, coming summer. It will give me a good idea what I want to do with my studies if I pass, and it will give me a good idea what I need to look for when I don't pass my upcoming exams (but of course I'm counting on the pass!!!!). I made it a 10/20/30 Day Challenge because I have no idea how many days I can keep it up, but I want to keep it up for 10 days at least! I will probably post the stories on this blog (it will give you some inspiration to do it yourself, and some entertainment to read when your bored, haha). I will post it under the tag: What does your idea day look like 10/20/30 day challenge.

If you do this challenge yourself: Please let me know!! Let me know the end results, or if you post it on your blog, I want to read the stories you come up with! Inspire each other, so to say.
If you take this challenge: Good luck, and lets try our best to figure out what we want to do, so we can become happy!

I will keep you updated!

Love you! Until next time!

(picture source: Tumbler, so no clue xD)

Another Quick update!

Hello my Dears,

Just a quick update today!
I bought a curl iron for my new haircut. I saw all these cute messy curl hairdo's for short hair, and I wanted to try it out. But I needed a curl iron for that, and I didn't have one yet. A curl iron has been on my want-list for ages, so this week I finally got one!
This is the end result:

I know all my facebook followers already saw it, but... It's so super cute I just wanted to show it in my blog, as well!

Lets see. One more week until I have to do my retake on Japanese speaking. I'm super nervous about it. I really don't know if I can make it, but I'm going to do my best!! Really I am!
I have been listening to our Japanese listening CD every moment I'm pretty much doing nothing. I'm even listening at it as I'm typing this! I'm listening to the grammar and I'm trying to translate it, sort of.

After next week I also have my new exams. Once again I have Japanese speaking, Japanese Listening, Japanese writing and Japanese reading. I'm not as confident about these exams as I have been about the last ones. I feel like I didn't do enough to be able to pas them. Even though I actually have been doing quite a bit if I think really hard on it. But I'm going to study super hard! I already decided to put even more time in my studies. Maybe even get a little less sleep every other day or so, and drink coffee. Well, drinking coffee is something I actually like, but normally don't do because it keeps me awake if I drink it after 2 PM or so.

I really really really hope I pass my exams. I really want to stay and learn more, to become a PR person in a Japanese fashion magazine or brand. That would be so cool!

aah. Did I mention I bough sneakers? I don't think I did. Here they are!

I know it isn't the prettiest picture but, these are my new babies. They are a bit hot for summer weather but they are so pretty! And comfi! I'm planning on getting new summer shoes as well. But I haven't found my perfect pair yet. I will keep looking, when I have time, besides studying, haha.

I think that is my update for now. I will keep my dear readers (you) updated about my exams the coming period, and the results, of course! Please wish me luck!!

Until next time, my dears!

Just a down day rant....

Hello my dears,

Today I'm having a bit of a down feeling. So I'm going to rant for a bit. Its pretty much a bullshit rant, I don't even know why I'm posting it, and I might take it down in a few days.

My day started out pretty well. I had a bit of a problem getting up, which isn't really all that normal for me, but hey, it happens. I actually had a small headache but I know thats because of the stress I'm having now (stress makes me clench my teeth together in my sleep, so my jaw hurts, which makes my teeth and my head hurt).
I dolled myself up cutely, I took the time to curl my hair and put on a cute dress.

And thats how I started my day!

At school.. It kind of started going down hill. For some reason I was already not feeling completely happy. Not depressed but, not happy either. Normally we (our class) meet in the canteen and walk to the classroom together. If someone stays behind, there is bound to be at least one person waiting for that person. But, as you may have guessed at this point, I stayed behind and no one waited for me. I know they probably didn't mean anything by it, but I got a fear for being left behind/left out/left alone. So I tried to keep calm and tell myself that they didn't mean anything by it, they just didn't notice me staying behind.
I walked to some of my other classmates, they where standing outside, smoking, and joined them to walk to the classroom.

Class was... sort of okay... I'm having more and more trouble actually remembering all the things we are told. And while I don't forget it fully, its worrying me. It is only 1.5 more weeks until our final exams! And that is where my stress comes from pretty much. I'm super afraid I'll fail. I don't want to leave this school, or my new friends! And I love the idea of becoming a PR person in a Japanese fashion company! (its my goal!!!)

After class I guess my day went down hill. And.. right now m just.... I don't know what I want anymore. I still really really really want to continue with my current study but, I'm starting to feel I'm powerless in what I want. No matter how hard I try I don't seem to be making any progress.

My therapist (yes, once again, I go to a therapist and I'm not ashamed of it.) said that I'm turning my frustration for myself into frustration for other people, and I guess he's right. I started gossiping, already some time ago, but today I actually got hurt by the things I said. I pretty much hate myself for it now. I guess you could say, I finally realized what I was doing.

.. m not even sure why I'm writing this...I might take this down after a few days, who knows...

I would wanna write more, but I don't really want to become much more personal then this at the moment so~..

Bai

Do it my way: Keeping a white skin!

Hello my Dears,

How are you all doing?? Enjoying the nice weather??
In Holland we have had super nice weather the past few days. A lot of sun, little rain, 20C and up. Perfect summer weather! I have been enjoying it as well, although I have mostly enjoyed it inside, with the window wide open. And when I went out, I wore a summer coat, factor 50 sunblock and sunglasses!

Why? Well, because I want to keep my skin white, of course! Now I know the ideal in our western countries is currently a sun tanned skin, but I love my white skin. It is actually what I think is most beautiful. And I mean white, not pale. I mean what kind of fashion would it be if you looked sick?

An other reason why I try to keep my skin white, is because the UV rays age your skin and, eventually, can cause skin cancer. Not something I really want so~ I just try to do my best to take care of my skin.

Tips to keep a white skin can be found all over the internet and in magazines. You can actually find more every year. Mom told me last year, that there had been a Australian researcher on the radio who said that white skin should actually be the Fashion Ideal. In Australia it already was (thats what my mom said, I wouldn't know). He predicted that white skin would eventually become a fashion ideal, again. Because white skin would equal a healthy skin! I can't wait for that to happen!!

Well, most of these "Keep your skin white" tips are already known, but I'm going to put them in a little list anyways.

Wear sunblock. Not just when you go tanning, but also when you go outside to shop, or bike or whatever. Your daycream might say it has a UV blocker, but you'd have to put your whole bottle on your face to get even just a little bit of sun protection. Sunblock is cheaper and works better.
Now I use a factor 50, because I burn really fast and I want to stay white. The difference between the factors gets smaller the higher the factor goes. So don't buy factor 90 or 100, it has almost no difference from factor 50. Unless you are talking about the price difference.
Don't use to little sunblock, reapply after about 2 hour and cover every part of your body thats not covert by your cloths or shoes!!

Wear sunglasses Not only do they protect your eyes from the sun (and the UV), when you wear sunglasses you don't have to squeeze your eyes together to see things. And squeezing your eyes gives you wrinkles! Something we don't really like, now do we?
The nice part about sunglasses is that they can be super cute! I actually have 2 pair of sunglasses right now. And they look so good on me! Theres a new sunglass fashion every year. So time to start a sunglass collection besides your shoes and bags collection!

Wear sun protection on your lips! This is actually something a lot of people forget (me including). You can get special lip balsams that protect against UV!

Wear a cute, sun blocking hat This year hats actually got back into fashion! Fashion and sun blocking in one! perfect!!

Try to stay out of the sun between 11 am and 3 pm These are the times when the sun is at its meanest. If you have to go into the sun, wear long sleeves (white reflects light and heat), try to wear a hat and don't forget your sunblock~!!

Well thats about it. Of course there are a lot more things to think to protect your skin. But these are pretty much the basics.

I wish you all a super nice summer, lots of fun and a healthy skin.

Love, Me.

(Picture source)

My new hairdo is here!!

My dears!!

I finally have it!! I finally did it!! The big day has been here today!!!
I got my new hairdo *happy dance*

I super duper love it <3
Let me know what you think???

Last day with long hair!!

Hello my dears,

Today is my last day with long hair!! I'm kind of nervous, I'm so used to having long hair.
But I'm also super looking forward to it!! I can't wait to get my hair cut!!

I'll be a short haired princess tomorrow afternoon. I will post a picture as soon as I can. Which will hopefully be tomorrow evening! Ooh I can't wait I can't wait!!!! *squeel*

Please look forward to it.

Until very soon <3

My current addiction: Takarazuka

Hello my dear readers,

It has been a while since I posted. I'm working on a "Do it my way" post but I wanted to post about something different first: Takarazuka.

I posted a little about Takarazuka in This post. Takarazuka is a theater form in Japan where all the roles are played by girls!! And~ It is my current addiction. I want to go to the Takarazuka theater in Japan someday and watch a show, for real. I already got to see Hamlet!! (a rock opera)(youtube), Elizabeth (a sort of side story of Sisi)(youtube)(youtube), The phantom of the opera (youtube) and my sweet sensei (thank you!!) lend me the DVD of the Takarazuka play The scarlet Pimpernel (youtube).

Takarazuka is a special theater style. Ichizo Kobayashi formed an all female theater group. Ichizo was the owner of Hankyu Railways, in Takarazuka, Japan in 1913. And thats where the Takarazuka Theater group got there name from! Western songs and shows were becoming populair in Japan, and Ichizo wanted to have an attraction to boost the ticket sales. And thus Takarazuka was born! (source: wikipedia)

I could tell you all about takarazuka here, but since I'm not really good in telling things I'll give you (once again) the wiki link so you can read all about it if you want! There is also a special Wikipedia on Takarazuka called Taki wiki with information about shows, the troupes and actresses.

Why do I think Takarazuka is cool? Well, for one because it is played by girls only. I think the Otokoyaku (the male role players) are super awesome. They look great, and even though you can see they are female from time to time, I tend to forget they are when I'm watching the play. The Musumeyaku (the female role players) are really beautiful and they remind me a bit of flowers when they are on stage. And then you have the costumes *dreams away*. I need to watch things with huge/fancy costumes in it at least 3 times. The Takarazuke costumes are so...so... they fit the entire image of the performance. And the best thing? You can go to Salon de Takarazuka and FIT THEM~ and get your PHOTO TAKEN *squeel*.

Please take a look at the youtube links, the wiki links and enjoy <3 And please let me know what you think!!! Maybe we could even someday organize a get together to watch Takarazuka together!!

Untill next time~

Pyuupiru

Hello my dears,

Now you must me wondering about the title, no?
Pyuupiru (ぴゅうぴる) is the name of a Japanese artist. Tonight I went to see a documentary about him. This documentary was also shows at International Film Festival Rotterdam.

The documentary was super interesting. A bit shocking as well.
Its about Pyuupiru, a Japanese artists, his live, love, art and his exhibitions. I don't even really know how to tell you about the documentary, if you like art, weird fashion things, you might like it. It is a bit shocking though. If you want to take a look about the things he made you should go here and look at the pictures in his portfolio. I think the things he makes are awesome, I hope I can go to see his work someday.

His story was kind of sad though. I know being a fashion designer/artist can be hard. And I know being Gay in a closed up community is hard as well. I can only try and imagen how hard it would be to be Trans-gender. Now add those 3 together. Thats sort of his story.

I only just learned about him, because of this documentary, but I really like his work, his story touched me, and I sort of feel some kind of respect for him now. It also makes me realize that I still do nothing to achieve my goals, hehe.

Please take a look at his portfolio, and let me know what you think.
And if you saw the documentary, what did you think of it??? I would love to talk about it!

Untill next time~!

One new hairdo, coming right up!

Hello my dears,

I'm super exited. Like, super super exited. Why? Because the date has finally been decided. The day I'm going to cut my hair! May 30~! I can't wait!

After thinking it over for almost halve a year, I'm finally doing it. I was always super afraid to cut my hair, because its a huge change (for me) and I was scared of changes. But now, already so much changed. I also already had my hair cut around March. It went form small of my back to just below my shoulder blades. It took me some time to get used to. But now I'm ready for the big step. My new hair length will be: somewhere in between the top of my shoulders to my chin. I'm looking super forward to it!

I've been gathering pictures of short hairstyles to get inspiration/ideas. I found lots of cute pictures that I reblogged on my tumbler . But I'm going to ask the hairdresser what she things is the best haircut for me (my sis will be the hairdresser I'm counting on you bis sis!!)

I might miss the pigtails and the braids, but hair will grow back. I don't think I will regret it. I've been wanting to cut my hair for so long now, but like I said I was afraid. Now, seeing all the girls around me cut they're hair, it gives me courage, but the main reason I'm cutting my hair is for me and me only!

It is really funny though, how my old friends are super against me cutting my hair, especially because its going to be so short. One of my friends even tried to forbid me to cut it. Not working *wink*. My new friends all think it will look super good/cute/sexy on me. It makes me feel good that they support me (my old ones as well, I know you do.)

so, May 30 is the day <3 I will post pictures, this time I will for sure <3

Until next time!!

Crafty tips: Roses.

Hello there!

This summer I'm going to try to "pimp" my own cloths, shoes and bags a bit. And I'm going to share my idea's with you (and the results, of course)

One idea I have been having for a year now, is to make little, soft pink roses and add them to my white sneakers (the fake all-star kind). I got this idea for my fashion show but I never used it. I did buy the sneakers back then, they are still white and I still got the fabric I used for my fashion show. So when I have time I'm going to put the idea in practice!

How to make roses out of ribbon. It is something I learned from a book one of my friends had. But you can get tutorials online (like this one). I also have a guide in a sewing book on how to make "Chanel roses". But I am going to make ribbon roses.

(picture source

I will add them along the stitches on the shoe. Maybe if it is super cute I will buy a second pair and put roses all over them, hehe. There are really a 100 different ways you can use those roses. They are simple and can give you clothing a cute little detail.

Here are some more idea's I had:
- Make a brogue with them (also a cute b-day gift)
- Make a hair piece with them
- Add them to your bag, you can also to cover up the smudge!
- Add them to your basic shirts, along the collar, or all along the straps.
- Just add them anywhere you like!

There is really no limit to what you can do with fake roses (homemade or bought). Lolita charm also had some cute idea's for what to do with fake roses!

I'll post the result of my sneakers when I'm done! Please look forward to it.
Or if you made something yourself, please show it to us~!

Until next time

Somewhat lost...

Hello there,

M just posting something quick today.

Today is the first day of my spring break. This week I'm going to sewing a lot (need to finish the maid costumes and a costume for my sister) and I got lots of homework and studying to do. I need to study harder for Japanese. Even though I'm doing okay, I'm still really slow and, well, I got this feeling that I'm actually doing quite bad with Japanese.

And I feel lost. I'm stuck and I don't know which goal to reach to, or which path to take. I like to see life as a road. Right now I have tons of little roads I can take but, I don't know which one! And everyone around me seems to be taking those little roads without much hesitation.

I want to take life as it is at the moment, but, I do want to keep moving forward somewhat. Now I just feel stuck. I really don't know what I want to do with my life. The truth is, I'm a real wanna-be-something. The things like cute and a fashion designer are things I have been wanting to be/become for ages but other then that. I sometimes wonder if I'm not just riding on other peoples ideals, and they enthusiasm they have for the things they love. I keep finding that I do that a lot, these days. I wonder if I used to do it even more. I mean, at least now I no longer try to be the person other people wanted me to become.

Some days ago someone asked my why I was becoming so distant from them. Maybe even a bit hostile? When I thought about that I had to admit to myself that I've become distant and hostile to almost all of my old friends. Maybe its because I'm changing? I'm becoming someone els and they no longer know the me who I have become? Maybe I've become distant and hostile because, because... because I think/feel they still want me to be the old me? I don't know.

An other friend made me think about something els. I have learned to appreciate things more then I used to. Like fashion. Or cloths in general. Art as well. I've always appreciated music (I've just never been completely obsessed with an idol or band).

Maybe I'm just thinking to much and living to little. Who knows.
Just my little rant.

Until next time <3

Do it my way: Being cute

Hello my Dearest readers,

Welcome to my first real "Do it my way" post!!
The last few weeks I have been working on writing a guide about "How to be cute". I looked up lists, articles and tons of other things that had to do with how to be cute. While looking up all these things I discovered something: All those lists and articles just tell you how to act cute and, while some of the steps are helpful, they just feel fake to me. I even found a list where it said I had to act like a 10 year old in order to be cute.

After I discovered this I went back to thinking about the basics: What is cute? When I started thinking about this I realized I never ever thought about this before (have you?). I now think "cute" differs per person. There is really no real standard for being cute. I believe that you have to make your own "cute" standard, for yourself, and to not let other be a huge influence on your idea's.

So instead of making a guide on "How to be cute", I am going to write about the steps I took, and am taking, to try and be cute. Maybe my way of doing things can give you new idea's.
These idea's can also be used by other styles. Just insert any other style where the word cute is used, like cool. Goes for the guys as well. How to be manly *wink*.

> I think about myself being and acting cute. I think I do this about once a day. How would I dress if I could just magically make clothing appear, how do I act if I didn't have any barriers, those kind of things. I try to dress the way I thought about and I try to act the way I imagined it. In a way you could say I'm trying to shape myself to my own fantasies. Sometimes I write it down. It is really funny to see how my idea of cute changes from day to day!

> I practice being cute. This might sound kind of sad and/or crazy but I make poses and faces in frond of the mirror. In a way you could say I train myself to act in a way I find cute. This way I can make this way of acting my own and if it becomes natural to me, I will never look fake! It really makes me laugh as well. Sometimes I pull really weird faces and I end up laughing about myself. (A lot of models do this as well! Try it!)

> I smile when I feel like smiling. Smiling makes me happy. And I think smiling is cute, thus, I smile. Smiling is good for you (even the scientists say so!). All in all, I have lots of reasons to smile, so I smile.

> I can't always act cute. Sometimes, when I feel really depressed, I just can't act cute. I used to try to always act cute, even if I felt bad, especially when I felt depressed, but it takes up a lot of energy. When I'm not feeling well I just act the way I feel at that moment. Theres really no reason to force yourself to act a way you don't want to. I even think that it is bad for you.

> I wear cloths that suit my body type, are comfortable and that I think are cute. This is actually something I found in a lot of lists. And I think you should always wear cloths that suit your body type and where you are comfortable in. So this pretty much goes for any style.
When I wear comfortable cloths that I think are cute and suit my body, I feel a lot more cute and happy when when I wear cloths that are to tight or to big and saggie (big cloths can be cute, if you know how to wear them).

> I try to have a cute air around me, more then a cute image. This one is a bit hard to explain. I try to recreate the feeling I get with cute, more then that I try to be like the people in the pictures I find, or to have the cloths they wear.

> I noticed my opinion about what is cute changes a lot. One day I can find a picture that I think is totally cute and a week later I can't remember why I thought it was cute again. So I try to look up new cute things every day (or every other day). Tumblr is a great place to look up pictures. I reblog the pictures to keep this memorized. I only save the really cute or pretty pictures.

This is pretty much how I try to be cute. There are a lot more things I do to be/become cute, but these are the ones I want to share with you. I hope you can get some idea's out of it.

Please let me know what you think! I love to hear about other peoples idea's and opinions.

Until my next post <3

Do it my way: Intro

Hello my dear readers,

Today I'm going to tell you a little more about the "Do it my way" project I have been working on. Things like the why of the whole project.

I wanted to create something on my blog that is more then me just ranting about random stuff. When I started this blog, my whole idea was to become this huge blog writer, writing about fashion and the things I create. Back then I thought that I could just become a writer like that just by starting a blog. Well, things didn't really turn out that way.

But this past period I've been having the same kind of idea's about this blog again. I want to make it into something. You don't just become, you have to work hard to create things too become.

And thats what this whole project is about.

With these "Do it my way" posts I want to learn how to research things that are interesting to share, and really write about them. I want to create posts that are interesting and fun to read, that give you idea's or support you with the idea's you have.

My goal for now is to set a date each month for these "Do it my way" posts. Each month I'm going to look for something interesting to write about. Right now I'm working on gathering idea's and writing drafts.

My second goal is to post a little something about fashion each month. Just something I like, or an idea I got, something small. I am, after all, a graduate in fashion, and it is still a big passion of mine, so I want to share little idea's about my fashion styles.

So in the end there will be 2 blog posts per month that will actually be well thought-out and planned. I can't give you any guarantees about the rest of the posts though. They will probably end up being rants again.

I am looking forward to writing these blog posts. I hope you are looking forward to reading them. I will try my very best. And I will probably curse myself more then once for setting these goals. But I'm going to see this through to the end and create something I can use for my other goals.

Until next time,
which might very well be the first of my real "Do it my way".

Work in progress...

Hello my dear readers~

I would Love to write a really long post about all the things I have done, thought about, brain stormed about and .. really just write a lot of stuff, but~... M not gonna do that.
No, everything I still work in progress.

So~ What am I going to write about??

-> To start things off.. I GOT A 70% for 2 of my JAPANESE TESTS which is sooo good for me. yay~. I did fail an other one BUT I hoped to fail it so I could retake it. I really messed it up with stupid mistakes which I hope to be able to redo now.

-> M still working on "the "Do it my way" way of doing things" blog posts. I got a lot of idea's, but I really need to work them out. Along with the fashion view I'm working on. Fashion thing? yes, I'm working on a fashion thing. I'm half going against fashion, half following the Japanese fashion, half following what had been predicted here in Europe and America. It's really fun. I enjoy being busy with fashion again. And totally not following the rules~ of fashion~... aka the fashion prognoses. Well half of the times, anyways.

-> Animecon is coming up, so in between studying and having fun I'm sewing the last bit of the maid costumes. Why am I sewing maid costumes? check this post and maybe you'll get it. If not, just leave a comment ;) Anyways, it's really soon, and... I'm looking kind of forward to it.. kind of not.. I wonder if an Animecon is still the right place for me to be... well I guess I'll find out then, no?

And I guess thats it for today. I could totally fill this post with a lot more random ranting but, I really don't feel like it so. I'll leave it at this.

Love you guys,
Untill next time~

small update 11/4

Hello my dear readers!

As much as I'd like to post a full post now, I should be studying, which, while writing this blog post, I am obviously not doing.

Just wanted to kind of let you know whats going on.

-> So I got my test weeks going on right now. Totally not fun. I don't get to see my friends a lot, if at all, which sucks, and I'm pretty much stuck at home, doing nothing but, you guessed it, study... or reading..
On the bright side~... I changed a 50% to a 70% on a test! So I showed myself I can actually do it! Best thing of all? Its my worst subject, yay (Talking Japanese and translating from English to Japanese, if you want to know).

-> Okay next thing on my update list: Writing a special kind of blog post once a month.
Yes I actually want to be serious about writing this blog. So I am planning on writing one special post at least once a month. It will be about fashion, My opinion about some stuff (other then my normal ranting) and whatever I think of later. Maybe some beauty tips that have helped me. I'm still thinking it out.
Up until now it has the name: The "Do it my way" of doing things-project. Please look forward to it.

-> did you know smiling makes you happy? If you didn't, try it. Just smile at random things. Big smiles, small smiles, shy smiles, just smile. It makes you feel happier (and goofy, which makes me happy as well when I allow myself to be goofy). Smiling when your sad also helps you cheer up, or so I noticed. If you tried it: please let me know how it worked for you. It could be a great support for others to try it as well. Cause really, we need more smiles in this frowny, stressy world.

And I guess thats about it.

See you next time~!

Friends with benefits (read before you judge)

Hello my dear readers,

Today I have a very special something I want to talk about:
Friends with benefits. Now I hear most of you thinking: Omg she wants to talk about having 18+ action with friends/no strings attached. Think again.
No, the Friends with benefits I want to talk about is something completely different then that.

I actually though this up thanks to a friend, to whom I talked with about relations, and of course the sweet messages I got from my dear readers.

When talking to my friend about relations, I told him I kind of think some couples are prisoners of they're relations (my opinion, my view). They must see each other every week/weekend, they have to spend all they're spare time talking on the phone/text messaging/on chat. I got a really strong dislike for must's and have to's. I told him I would like my (future) relations to be more like friends with benefits. Of course his first reaction was "yea, my too, but nobody is really open to that." which is true, if you think of the 18+ kind of "friends with benefits". But, to me, those kind of 18+ things don't really matter, they are not why I want to have a relationship with someone. If I wanted just that I'd take a one night stand or something. All I really want is being loved, love in return, have fun, cuddle, joke, laugh, cuddle some more, hug, laugh some more and those kind of things. To me, those things are already benefits to friendship. Or relationships if the emotion love is involved.

I looked the meaning of "benefit" up in the dictionary to make my point. What is a benefit?
1. something that is advantageous or good; an advantage
2. a payment or gift, as one made to help someone
3. an act of kindness; good deed; benefaction
4. to do good to; be of service to
(source)

So in my opinion friend who hug me, talk to me, have fun with me, laugh with me, who make me feel comfortable are already kind of friends with benefits. Every friend has they're own benefit, if you really look at it.

So to all my dear readers who leave me sweet comments: Thank you for being my friend with benefits.
To all my friends at school: Thank you for being my friend with benefits.
To my future friends: thank you for being my friend with benefits.
And to my future love involved relationship: Thank you for being my friend with benefits who loves me for who I am.

Just me doing an other little rant.
Now I kind of do wonder what your opinion is about this?! Don't be shy and leave a message!

Until next time~

Spring....

Hello my dear readers,

For those who live in Holland (or around Holland), have you noticed? Spring has finally started! Isn't it great? The sun in shining, people smile more often, and couples pop up everywhere! It makes me feel all the more shitty because I feel depressed when everything should be great!

Normally spring would be my most favorite season. I love how the flowers bloom, how the sun is nice and doesn't burn of your skin the moment you step out of the house, baby sheep are being born! The green is young and the clouds lovely white and fluffy! Normally I love this. But this year around, I might even hate it more then I did last year.

Spring turns out the be the season I get the most hardship thrown my way. Last year it was my exam -and even though I put up a decent collection I still fucked up because it wasn't MY collection, but the collection I had to make for school-, this year it's my grades and the maybe end of my going to school. Along with some other shit that happened that are really all my own fault. Which of course makes it suck even more.

I just started recovering from my winter depression and now I suddenly got a spring depression! And I'm pretty sure it's not going to be fixed by swallowing medication or putting myself under a special lamp.

I really need to find something fun to do for myself or something. I promised a classmate I would make cookies again sometime soon. But you know what? The thing about cookies, pie, cake and muffins is, that I love making them and I Love to see my friends and other people enjoy them, but I dislike them myself. I don't taste them for some reason.

My classmate said my room smelled like cookies, apparently. My ex always used to tell me I smelled like fresh baked cookies. Could that be the reason I can't taste my own baking? One more thing I ruin for myself. But in this case there is very little I can do about it I guess.

But I guess since I made the promise, I'm going to be baking coconut cookies soon. Maybe I'll make cinnamon muffins as well, maybe. At least m gonna get praised for it, and I get to see my friends enjoy my baking again. Its one of the little things I enjoy in life, I guess. It's just to bad the fear of one day loosing those praises, or smiling faces always looms in the back of my head.

I will shut up todays rant now.

Until next the next, hopefully more happy rant.

Ohanami~!

Hello my dear readers~

For you who don't understand the titel of this blog piece: Ohanami is a Japanese word that means Flower blossom viewing. Which is what we did today~!


Aren't they beautiful? It was my first time going to an Ohanami. I went there with my friends, my Japanese teachers and they're friends and some other people from school.

I had a lot of fun. Sometimes I really wonder how old we are because we tend to act like little kids, doing stuff like trowing chocolate easter eggs to each other, playing ball, doing "Darumasan ga koronda" and lots of other fun stuff.

I'd like to say I feel happy now, but I feel kind of lonely after having a gathering like todays. Maybe because I'm afraid it won't last forever? Because I'm afraid I'll forget? I don't know, but I do look forward to the next time.

I won't bother you with more ranting on being lonely and blah and stuff and I'll just show you some pretty pictures. I hope you'll enjoy the pictures, and untill next time~!


Onigiri
Under the Sakura tree


Hope you enjoyed~ Untill next time~

Restless rant..

Hello my dear readers *bows*

That looked so cool in my head, to bad I'm actually anything but cool...
Anyways the reason I'm writing this evening at 11.26 pm: I feel restless. And not just a little bit either! Its super annoying.

I think it is because I haven't been amongst people today. Which makes me feel super lonely and sad. But I have school again tomorrow yay. Yes I'm one of those weird people that actually loves to go to school. But hey what would you do if you felt uber lonely at the student house your living at (or at your parents home, for that matter).

Last week was really fun. A few of my classmates and my senpai finally got me to say yes to help them in a musical play for the open day of our school. I had wanted to help sooner but I was always focused on my homework. Now that I decided I wanted to have more fun I thought it wouldn't hurt to help. It was lots of fun! (if any of my senpai read this: you rock and your awesome and thank you for letting me join)

We were doing a "Takarazuka" play. Which is a Japanese theater style, based on the western musicals and revue, and where all the parts are played by girls! It's really awesome! Anyhow, I got to play a guy. And I got the feeling I kind of really sucked at it, even if I played my part okay. I want to be more manly sometimes. I got this girl in my class whom I totally adore. She's super cute at times, but she can be really manly, which is so totally awesome. I want to be like that, too. When I feel like it.

I think thats making me feel restless too. I hate not being able to be the things I want to be or do the things I want to do. Though I know I can't be everything I want to be, or do everything I want to do perfectly, I still want to. It makes me feel like a failure. "Yet an other thing I can add to my 'fail' list".

It's kind of ironic. While cleaning my room today I put up some new "luck4you" cards. Theres this one that says :"The only thing that can make you happy, is being happy with who you are". Which is, as much as I hate to admit it, something I'm not. When I realized in this blog entry I really don't like talking about myself, I've been really thinking about who I am. Who I really am, not just who I want to be. When I was thinking about it I also realized I tend to just go hyper over things because my "role" needs me to go hyper over it. Like the way I used to totally go hyper over lolita cloths. Now don't get me wrong I LOVE lolita fashion. It's just... not really my thing, to wear. I have it with a lot of other things. But really I don't even have favorite things. Not really anyways.

It may sound weird but, I'm really happy I'm realizing some of these things. I'm finally getting to know me. I'm getting to know parts of me, both parts I like and parts I dislike, but they're still parts of me. I can finally introduce I bit more about myself then just my name, birthday, age and occupation. Just a bit, but it's more then before so I'm happy.

Tomorrow I'm going to see if I can help my senpai out with some school news paper kind of thing. Hopefully I can help a bit.

I'm still restless. And I'm still not tired. Maybe I will dig around Gyaru pictures now. I want to get new shoes, but I have no idea which kind I want yet (I'm stuck between buying high super cute summer heals or good comfi sneakers).

O well. Picture of my hair is still in the making, my cam died. Need to remember to look for a new one.

I hope I didn't bother anyone with this rant (and if I have, thank you for reading it all, even though it bothered you). Hopefully next post will be a bit more... less rant like.

Until next time~ *tries an attempt at bowing really manly*
(time now, 11:54 PM)

Back on track...

Hi readers,

Lets make a party~ I'm finally better! well, almost better. M still coughing my lungs out BUT I feel great!

Starting this week I'm going to try to work hard to get my stuff back on track. Because of the week being sick, I'm behind on my studies, big time. I tried to keep up with my Japanese studies a bit, but I still missed so much! Getting my studies back on track (and my homework) is my number one prioritie! I really really really want to be able to say I tried my best. Right now I don't think I will make it, but I am going to try anyways.

My next step to getting my stuff back on track: Training! I've been sitting on my lazy butt all day sins the start of my studies. The only exercise I get are during Japanese Workshops or when I bike to school/the train station. I want to lose my fluffy belly so I'm going to work out my belly muscles~ Will help me get the perfect belly this summer. I want bikini's

One other thing on my list is just to have fun~! I'm way to stressed about all the things around me. I have to do this I have to do that I have to I have to! It's making me gloomy because I'm living my life doing stuff I have to do because I have to do them. It is time I start having Fun.

I'm also gonna post my new cute hair when I have time and when it is doing what I want it to do, haha.

Well~ I'll keep you updated.

Ba Bai~

Still sick..

Hello everybody~

As the title says, I'm still sick. It has been a week now and its really frustrating.
Today is the first day I've felt good enough to make homework. Its really really frustrating.

Time for a little frustration rant:

Right now nothing is working out the way I want it too. I'm behind on my studies thanks to being sick. I feel like shit and I don't look cute at all. My legs hurt from laying down all day, it hurts to walk because my legs hurt. My head is still really fussy so I can only do the most simple homework. And its just, ugh. I wish I never got sick.....

And you know whats the worst of this time being sick? I feel uber lonely. Everybody is busy, and I don't blame them, I should be busy as well. But I go about my day watching Anime and Asian Drama's and checking my facebook and msn for messages. And each time I check facebook and msn for no reason, cause there are no messages...
Maybe I'm being unreasonable, but I feel super lonely.

And I feel lost. I don't know what I want to do anymore. I pretty much already gave up hope for my studies, even though I'm still trying (other wise I wouldn't be making homework while still sick, don't you think?)but... *shrug* I just don think I can do it in the end. Maybe I should just become a hip, super fashionable house mom or something.

I hope I feel better soon.

End of my rant.

See ya

Ill and Shocked...

Hi there readers,

This week I wanted to make a totally awesome post about some cool stuff I discovered while browsing the internet, about my new haircut (which is totally awesome) and a lot of other cute/cool/awesome stuff.

But ever sins last Friday I haven't really felt like writing about my totally awesome stuff. I've been ill sins Friday. And now I'm missing classes which I really don't like. If only school wasn't a 4 hour train trip away from where I am now.

And I'm really shocked. I've pretty much been glued to the television and news web pages to follow everything thats happening in Japan. It's really horrible. I'm praying for all the people in Japan that have been hurt and those who have lost people dear to them.

I hope things go better soon.

Maybe next time I'll feel up to posting about my totally awesome things, but right now, Nothing is totally awesome when I look at the news and hear yet an other drama in Japan :(

Signing out now.

Changing again

Hiya readers,

As you may have noticed (or at least I sure hope you noticed) I changed my blog. Why? Because I can *insert evil laughter*. And because I wanted to.

Its been a while sins I started this blog and a hell of a lot of stuff has happened sins then. I changed, big time. I went to a new school, I made new friends, I lost old ones, I discovered new things about myself, I found new interests and a whole lot of other stuff you probably don't really wanna read all about. So yea I changed my blog because I'm changing. My whole blog will probably change with time.

So yea.....
I added a few .... how are those things called again? well anyways there is a "blogs that are totally worth following" box to your left, and a "My current obsession" box at the top. You SHOULD totally check out "XiaXue" if you haven't already. She's kinda cool. Won a blog award or something along those lines so thats totally worth checking out.


Maybe its time for a little update about me?

Lets see~ ......... *draws a blank*.....
Okay, so maybe, unlike some of my friends think, I find it really hard to talk about myself. I really don't know what to say about myself. Besides the fact that I can now admit that I actually really don't like talking about myself. Sure I talk about the things I DO a lot. But really about myself? Nop, not really, Never really did either.

okay~ About what I do then, maybe???

I'm gonna stop sewing for people. At least for a while. Its about damn time that I put myself in first place. And thats just what I'm gonna do!

I started really liking baking. Like it even more that people like my baking. Got to watch out for my ego though.... *looks at her ego thats about as small as her pinkie* oooorrrr maybe not.

So what more~..... I need to kick up my skills for school. Its actually not going to well. But I'm trying, so if I fail I can at the very least say I tried my hardest.

I kind of stopped liking Lolita fashion. Its not a big part of my live anymore. Though I still love frills and dolls and all those kind of cute and girlie things, I'm now more interested in Gyaru and Mori (Japanese fashion styles). Though unlike I did will Lolita fashion I don't want to make the mistake of saying "I want to be a (insert any type of subculture)." I don't want to be anything. I just like the cloths and I'm going to wear them My way. I don care what people say as long as I like it.


And thats about all the things I can think of for now. Hopefully next time I'll have something really interesting to catch your attention.

Have a fashionable weekend ya'll~